a hero for the day?

hey! I'm on a grumpy mode at the moment. hehe!

overall today is going pretty well, I had a chance to watch two movies today. It was wanted (cool) and dark knight (which is also cool, but one level higher from wanted). I like Batman better. Was in super cool mode until I have to satisfy one mommy's little girl who is hungry. I have to look for a toasted bread for her night meal. I'm sorry for being such an a**hole here, but I'm fed up of being the superhero here. Of course unlike superheroes such as Batman, spidey, or any other superheroes you might now. I'm talking more to a heroic sister and as a daughter in the family. I don't mean to be cruel or what. I'm really kind of tired of all this. -SIGH-

Do you really want to be a superhero in your own family? Being dependable -well, I like being dependable- but sometimes, I feel like I'm tired of doing all the good stuff. To be honest I love being a good dependable  daughter, but it's kinda tiring. Sometimes, I wish I could be the bad girl. The one that everybody is going to say YES to what I want. Like she is now (and I think she will always have this special treatment) "What I want is what I MUST get!!" No one has the right to say NO! No! It's a big No NO!! Oh, Life is going to be so perfect, isn't it??

Oh no! I'm a total disaster. Why can't I be better? I'm whining about all this. I can only do this to lighten up my heavy thoughts. I think I can be more relieved writing down all my anger (or disappointment is the suitable word for my mixed feeling right now) why why why does it always me?????? 

I think I should stop writing it down. For the wrap up, I'm tired of being the good one but maybe I'm too scared to let my family's (esp. my mom) feeling down. I'm too scared to let them down just because of my temporary ego. It's sucks you know!!!!

Arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh...am I good enough??

falling,

coffee.stains